How to calm your body when stress hits

How do you calm your body down quickly?

The fastest route is usually your breath. Breathe in gently through your nose, let the breath go down into your belly, and breathe out slowly, a little longer than you breathed in. Repeat for a few minutes. If you have more time, work through your muscles, tensing and releasing each group in turn.

These techniques aim to bring on what the NIH's National Center for Complementary and Integrative Health (NCCIH) calls the relaxation response: slower breathing, lower blood pressure and a reduced heart rate. The center describes it as the opposite of the stress response. You cannot think your way out of a racing heart, but you can often breathe your way to a slower one.

Belly breathing, step by step

Diaphragmatic breathing, also called belly or abdominal breathing, uses the large muscle under your lungs rather than the muscles of your chest and shoulders. Cleveland Clinic lists helping you relax, lowering blood pressure and reducing heart rate among its benefits. The NHS offers a calming version that can be done standing, sitting or lying down.

• Get as comfortable as you can, with your feet flat on the floor if you are sitting, and loosen anything tight around your waist.
• Place one hand on your upper chest and the other just below your ribs.
• Breathe in slowly through your nose so that your stomach pushes out against your lower hand. The hand on your chest should stay fairly still.
• Breathe out gently through your mouth, letting your stomach fall.
• The NHS suggests counting steadily from one to five on the in-breath and again on the out-breath if it helps, and repeating for at least five minutes.

Breathing with a longer exhale

Many breathing exercises emphasize a slow out-breath. A 2023 randomized study from Stanford, published in Cell Reports Medicine, compared three five-minute daily breathing practices with mindfulness meditation over a month. The exhale-focused practice, called cyclic sighing, produced greater improvement in mood and a larger drop in breathing rate than meditation did.

Cyclic sighing involves a breath in through the nose, a second shorter top-up breath in, and then a long, slow exhale through the mouth. The study was small and remote, with healthy volunteers, so it is promising rather than settled. But a longer exhale is easy to try: if you breathe in for a count of four, try breathing out for six.

An earlier randomized trial in healthy adults, published in Frontiers in Psychology in 2017, found that eight weeks of diaphragmatic breathing training reduced negative mood and lowered cortisol compared with a control group. It was also a small study.

Progressive muscle relaxation

Stress tends to live in the muscles: a clenched jaw, raised shoulders, a tight stomach. Progressive muscle relaxation, as the NCCIH describes it, involves tensing different muscles in your body and then releasing the tension. The contrast helps you notice tension you were carrying without realizing it, and the release lets it go.

• Sit or lie somewhere you will not be interrupted for ten to fifteen minutes.
• Start with your feet. Tense the muscles firmly, not painfully, for a few seconds.
• Release all at once and notice the difference for several breaths.
• Move up through your body: calves, thighs, buttocks, stomach, hands, arms, shoulders, neck and face.
• Skip any area that is injured or painful, and keep breathing normally throughout.

Making these skills work when you need them

A technique you have practiced is much easier to reach for under pressure than one you are reading about for the first time. A few minutes a day on calm days builds the habit. Learning to relax goes into building relaxation into your life over time, especially if you have been busy for so long that slowing down feels strange.

For the moments when your mind is spinning as much as your body, combine breathing with grounding techniques. For intense emotion, managing overwhelming emotions has more options.

Laura Bass works with adults in Charlotte, North Carolina, on coping skills and stress, and she works with the whole person, mind, body and spirit. Clients choose how much any spiritual or energy work is part of their sessions. Read about individual counseling or contact Laura.

When to check with a doctor

The NCCIH says relaxation techniques are generally considered safe for healthy people, with rare reports of them worsening symptoms in people with epilepsy, certain psychiatric conditions, or a history of abuse or trauma. If an exercise makes you feel worse, stop. If you have a breathing condition such as asthma or COPD, Cleveland Clinic suggests talking with your provider about breathing exercises first.

Chest pain, shortness of breath, or a racing heart that does not settle can have medical causes. Get them checked, and call 911 for symptoms that could be a heart attack. In an emotional crisis, call or text 988.

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