Inner child therapy

What is inner child therapy?

Inner child therapy is counseling that pays attention to the feelings, needs and beliefs you formed as a child and still carry as an adult. The idea is simple: much of how we react under stress was learned early, often for good reasons, and those old lessons can keep running long after the situation that taught them has gone.

“Inner child” is a popular, informal concept. It is not a diagnosis, and it is not one standardized therapy with a manual. Therapists from different traditions use the phrase for related ways of working, and a 2018 paper in the American Journal of Psychotherapy describes it as a psychotherapeutic notion that can be brought into mainstream approaches such as cognitive-behavioral therapy. Our guide to what inner child work is explains where the idea comes from and what it does and does not mean.

In practice, most of it is quieter than people expect. It is conversation: noticing when a reaction seems bigger or younger than the moment calls for, getting curious about what that part of you learned, and practicing a kinder, steadier response to it.

Signs it may help

People rarely arrive asking for inner child work by name. More often they notice a pattern they cannot argue themselves out of. Some common ones:

• Saying yes when you mean no, and resenting it afterward
• An inner critic that sounds a lot like a parent or teacher
• Reactions in a marriage or friendship that feel too big for what actually happened
• A fear of being left, or of being too much for people
• Never quite feeling allowed to rest, however much you get done
• Old family dynamics returning every time you visit home
• Becoming a parent and finding your own childhood suddenly close

You do not need a dramatic story, a diagnosis or a clear memory to begin. Our pages on people-pleasing and the inner critic look at two of these patterns more closely. Working out what sits underneath is part of the counseling, not a requirement for starting it.

How Laura works with the inner child

Laura offers inner child work as part of individual counseling with adults. It is not a course, a package or a fixed number of sessions. It is one way of looking at whatever brought you in, whether that is anxiety, low mood, grief, shame, a life transition or a relationship that keeps snagging on the same thing, used when it fits and when you want it.

She is an active participant rather than a silent one. She asks questions, reflects back what she notices and shares resources when they are genuinely relevant. You set the direction and the pace. If you would rather stay with present-day relationships and let the history come in where it fits, that is a legitimate way to do this work.

Laura works with the whole person: mind, body and spirit. Clients who want it can bring spiritual healing or Emotion Code work alongside counseling; her complementary trainings are listed on her about page. This is always your choice, and talk therapy alone is completely fine. Emotion Code practitioners describe emotions from past experiences becoming trapped; that mechanism is not established by scientific evidence, and the work is not medical care or a treatment for any condition. See inner child work and the Emotion Code for how the two can sit together.

Therapists who work with the inner child draw on different methods. This page does not list the ones Laura uses, because that is hers to describe. Ask her what she draws on and what a typical session looks like.

What the evidence says

Honestly: research on inner child work as a named method is thin, a handful of small and mostly uncontrolled studies. Research on related therapies that work with child-like feelings and unmet early needs is stronger. Schema therapy, developed by Jeffrey Young, has randomized trials behind it, including a 2006 trial for borderline personality disorder in Archives of General Psychiatry, and the International Society of Schema Therapy describes its “limited reparenting” as the heart of that treatment. A 2023 meta-analysis of imagery rescripting, a technique for working with painful memories, found it performed better than waitlist controls and about as well as other established treatments.

Those findings are about specific therapies in studies, not a prediction for any one person, and they are not a description of how Laura works. Our page on whether inner child work helps goes through the research in more detail.

Pacing and safety

Early memories can bring up strong feelings, sometimes from things you have not thought about in a long time. That is why pacing matters more here than in many kinds of counseling. SAMHSA, the federal mental health agency, describes trauma-informed care as built on safety, trust, collaboration and empowerment. In a session, that looks like explaining before suggesting, asking before trying anything new, and treating “not yet” as a full answer.

A careful therapist works with what you remember and how it affects you now; they do not tell you what must have happened. If you have a history of trauma, or have ever felt numb or far away when old memories came up, say so early. If a session stirs up more than expected, when inner child work feels overwhelming covers some steadying steps.

Laura Bass Counseling is not a crisis service. If you are in immediate danger, call 911. For a mental health crisis, call or text 988 at any hour.

In Charlotte and near Tryon

Laura’s main practice is in south Charlotte, convenient for much of Mecklenburg County. Inner child work tends to go best with a steady rhythm of sessions, so when you get in touch, think about which times you could keep week after week in Charlotte traffic. The Charlotte area page describes the neighborhoods closest to the practice, and our local guide to inner child work in Charlotte covers choosing a therapist and support in the city.

She also has a part-time office at The Healing Cottage in Columbus, the Polk County seat, about five miles from Tryon. If you live in the foothills, inner child therapy in Tryon explains that office. Because it is part-time, ask Laura which days she is there, and ask for the address of whichever office you plan to use.

If you live in South Carolina

Laura is licensed in North Carolina and South Carolina, so living across the state line is not a barrier. Fort Mill, Rock Hill and Indian Land sit close to the Charlotte practice; Landrum, Inman and Campobello are closer to Columbus. See inner child work in Fort Mill, Rock Hill and Indian Land for the York and Lancaster County side.

Getting started

Use the contact page or call 704-706-3264. A short message is enough: your name, the best way to reach you, which office you would prefer, and that you are interested in inner child work. You do not need to explain your history in the first message.

Practical details such as cost, scheduling and insurance are best answered by Laura directly. She is in network with several plans; check your own plan’s mental health benefits too. If you would like to know what usually happens next, read your first inner child therapy session, and take a look at the questions to ask before starting inner child work. They work for any therapist, Laura included.

Laura works with adults 18 and over. If you are a parent working on your own childhood so you can parent differently, that is welcome; she works with the parents, not the children. She does not prescribe medication, so if you take any, keep working with the doctor who prescribes it.

The full guide

This page covers working with Laura. For everything else, from where the idea came from to attachment, reparenting, faith and exercises you can try gently at home, see the complete guide to inner child work in the Carolinas.

Common questions

Does Laura Bass offer inner child therapy in Charlotte?

Yes. Laura offers inner child work as part of individual counseling with adults 18 and over, at her main practice in south Charlotte and at a part-time office at The Healing Cottage in Columbus, near Tryon. It is woven into counseling rather than sold as a separate program. Use the contact page to ask how she would approach what you are dealing with.

Is inner child therapy a real therapy?

Inner child work is a widely used, informal idea, not a diagnosis and not one standardized treatment. Several researched therapies work with child-like feelings and unmet early needs, and their evidence is stronger than the evidence for inner child work as a named method. A good therapist will tell you plainly what they do and why, and you are entitled to ask.

Do I need a trauma history to start?

No. Many people come because of everyday patterns, such as people-pleasing, a harsh inner critic or trouble trusting a partner, rather than one painful event. If you do have a trauma history, the work needs careful pacing, and that is worth raising early so you and Laura can agree on how to keep it manageable.

Do I have to include spiritual or Emotion Code work?

No. Clients who want it can bring spiritual healing or Emotion Code work into their sessions, and clients who do not can have talk therapy alone. You decide, and you can change your mind. Emotion Code work is a complementary practice whose mechanism is not established by scientific evidence, and it is not a substitute for counseling or medical care.

Can I work with Laura if I live in South Carolina?

Yes. Laura is licensed in North Carolina and South Carolina. People in Fort Mill, Rock Hill and Indian Land often find the Charlotte practice close, and people in Landrum, Inman and Campobello may find the Columbus office closer. When you get in touch, mention where you live so the practical details are set up correctly.

How long does inner child therapy take?

There is no set number of sessions, and Laura does not promise results on a timetable. It depends on what you bring, what you want to change and how quickly it feels right to go. Some people come for a focused stretch around one pattern; others stay longer. It is reviewed together as you go, and you can always raise it.

Sources

The research and guidance referred to on this page. It is general information, not advice about your situation.

• Psychotherapies. National Institute of Mental Health.
• Hestbech AM. Reclaiming the inner child in cognitive-behavioral therapy: the complementary model of the personality. Am J Psychother, 2018. PubMed, National Library of Medicine.
• Limited reparenting. International Society of Schema Therapy (ISST).
• Giesen-Bloo J, et al. Outpatient psychotherapy for borderline personality disorder: randomized trial of schema-focused therapy vs transference-focused psychotherapy. Arch Gen Psychiatry, 2006. PubMed, National Library of Medicine.
• Kip A, et al. Efficacy of imagery rescripting in treating mental disorders associated with aversive memories: an updated meta-analysis. J Anxiety Disord, 2023. PubMed, National Library of Medicine.
• Trauma and Violence: What Is Trauma and Its Effects?. SAMHSA.