Can the Emotion Code help with grief?
Emotion Code practitioners describe grief as one of the emotions that can become trapped when a loss is not fully felt or processed at the time. In Dr. Bradley Nelson's model, an old grief, perhaps from a death years ago, can linger as emotional energy and affect how a person feels now. Discover Healing publishes accounts of people who say they felt lighter or found joy again after a trapped emotion of grief was identified and released.
Those accounts describe personal experiences, and Discover Healing's own testimonial pages note that it cannot promise any particular result. The idea that grief is stored as energy in the body, and can be found by muscle testing, is not established by scientific evidence. The Emotion Code is not a treatment for grief, depression or any mental health condition. Some people find it a quiet, reflective space in a hard season. That is the most anyone can honestly say for it.
Grief is not something to get rid of
It is worth saying plainly: grief is not a problem to be fixed. The American Psychiatric Association notes that for most people, grief-related symptoms decrease over time and do not keep them from daily life. The pain softens and changes shape, and many people find they carry the person they lost with them in new ways.
Grief also does not follow a neat set of stages. It can come in waves, return around anniversaries and holidays, and look very different from one person to the next or one culture to the next. Feeling sad, numb, angry, guilty or lost after a death is part of mourning, not a sign that something inside needs to be released. Any approach to grief, complementary or clinical, should respect that rather than hurry it.
What tends to help most people
The National Institute on Aging's guidance on coping with loss points to ordinary, steady supports: staying connected with people who care about you, looking after sleep, food and movement, letting yourself feel what you feel, and taking your time with big decisions. Grief support groups, faith communities and friends who can simply listen are often as important as any professional help.
When grief needs clinical support
For a smaller group of people, grief stays intense and disabling long after a loss. In 2022 the American Psychiatric Association added prolonged grief disorder to the text revision of its diagnostic manual, the DSM-5-TR. It is not diagnosed simply because someone is still sad. Broadly, it applies when an adult's loss was at least 12 months ago (at least 6 months for children and adolescents), and, for most days in the last month, the person has experienced intense longing for or preoccupation with the person who died, along with at least three other symptoms, such as:
- Feeling as though part of oneself has died, or a disrupted sense of identity.
- A marked sense of disbelief about the death, or avoiding reminders that the person is gone.
- Intense emotional pain, such as anger, bitterness or sorrow, or emotional numbness.
- Great difficulty reengaging with friends, interests or plans for the future.
- Feeling that life is meaningless, or intense loneliness.
Signs it is time to talk to a professional
Prolonged grief disorder is diagnosed only by a qualified clinician, and the grief also has to last longer than would be expected in the person's social, cultural or religious setting. You do not need a diagnosis to deserve help, though. Consider speaking with a therapist or your doctor if grief is making it hard to work, care for yourself or others, or get through the day; if you are drinking or using other substances to cope; if you feel stuck or cut off months after the loss; or if the death was sudden, violent or traumatic.
Grief counseling and psychotherapy are the routes with evidence behind them. Laura Bass offers individual counseling as part of her psychotherapy practice in Charlotte, and that is the pathway for grief that is weighing heavily on your life. Her Emotion Code work is a separate, complementary pathway, and choosing it is never required for counseling.
If you are in crisis
Grief can bring thoughts of not wanting to go on, or of wanting to be with the person who died. If that is happening, please reach out now. Call or text 988, the Suicide and Crisis Lifeline, at any hour, or chat at 988lifeline.org. If you or someone else is in immediate danger, call 911.
If you are considering the Emotion Code while grieving
Some people choose a complementary practice alongside grief support, especially if their faith or outlook makes it meaningful to them. If you do, keep it in its place. Use it in addition to, not instead of, the people and care that support you. Tell your doctor or therapist about it. And be cautious of anyone who suggests grief can be cleared in a session, or that you should feel finished with a loss by a certain point.
To understand the idea behind these claims, see trapped emotions explained. For how the method fits alongside therapy, see the Emotion Code and psychotherapy, and for a balanced look at the research, does the Emotion Code work? The Emotion Code guide collects the full series, and the Emotion Code service page describes how Laura approaches it.
Common questions
Can the Emotion Code take away grief?
No practice can or should take grief away, because grief is a normal response to losing someone you love. Emotion Code practitioners describe releasing trapped emotions of grief, and some people report feeling lighter afterward, but that is the method's framing and personal experience, not an established effect. The idea that grief is stored as energy is not supported by scientific evidence.
What is prolonged grief disorder?
It is a diagnosis added to the DSM-5-TR in 2022. For an adult, it can apply when a loss was at least 12 months ago and, for most days in the last month, the person has felt intense longing for or preoccupation with the person who died, plus at least three other symptoms such as identity disruption, numbness or intense loneliness, causing real difficulty in daily life. Only a qualified clinician can diagnose it.
How long is grief supposed to last?
There is no correct timeline. Many people find the sharpest pain eases over months, while waves of grief return around anniversaries and holidays for much longer. That is normal. What matters more than the calendar is whether grief is steadily making it impossible to function, or bringing thoughts of not wanting to live. Either is a good reason to talk to a professional.
Is the Emotion Code a substitute for grief counseling?
No. The Emotion Code is a complementary practice and is not offered as treatment for grief or any mental health condition. Grief counseling and psychotherapy are the routes with evidence behind them. Some people use a complementary practice alongside counseling for their own reflection, and if you do, it is wise to tell your therapist or doctor about it.
Can I see Laura for grief counseling without any Emotion Code work?
Yes. Laura keeps psychotherapy and her complementary work as separate pathways, and clients choose what to include. Grief counseling is psychotherapy and does not involve the Emotion Code unless you ask about it. If you are unsure which pathway fits, ask Laura directly through the contact page.